Today my friend Ruby took me on a lightening tour of the Gold Coast, to show me where the arts, the buzz, the cafes, the restaurants and the views sat. I am grateful, enlightened, and a little more at peace with the idea of living here. Also, my friend Ruby gave me a bag of fruit picked from the trees at her home on the hinterland. Said trees are, apparently, FREAKY MUTANT STEROID trees. Behold, the mother of all limes:

I am going to make mojitos. You bet your BOOTY I am going to make mojitos.